RSS Feed (xml)I'm not gonna make this entry very long. This friend of mine, arrived here in the USA just last week under the K1 visa. A day before her marriage, her fiance told her that he wants her to sign a pre-nup agreement. My friend was shocked when she heard about this coz before she came here, her fiance did not told her regarding this matter. So, they post-poned the wedding since, my friend need time to think about this thing. And now she is confused and asking for my advice. My friend is not into the assets of the guy. She is very willing to sign the pre-nup agreement eventhough she felt uncomfortable with it. But what she only wants is that, she don't want to get pregnant within six months or so in order for her to adjust the life here in the US but her fiance won't agree to it. Her fiance will send her to school, and the reason why she don't want to get pregnant at this moment coz it is very uncomfortable for her to go to school with a big tummy, you know.
People will say that there is nothing wrong having a pre-nup agreement and that it is not a big deal. Pre-nup is common here in the US. But common doesn't necessarily make anything right. What would you feel when your fiance ask you to sign a pre-nup? Without discussing the issue first? I know..that there are few filipinas, who's into a pre-nup agreement. They are open-minded filipinas for sure. I'm not saying that my friend is not an open-minded person but I know that she's hurting right now.
But anyway, what can you say about this guys? I am not in the right position to give her advice coz honestly, I really dunno what to say. My friend says that if her fiance is not willing to compromise, it might better for her to go back to Philippines.
- The guy wants a pre-nup agreement and the girl don't want to get pregnant in 6 months or so.
- The girl is willing to sign the pre-nup as long as her fiance allow her not to get pregnant for a few months only. But the guy is selfish and not willing to compromise.
To my friend, just be strong girl.
Aja! Aja!
11 comments:
duh makalilisang pud anang pren-up oi ug maayo siya nga laki dapat gi discuss na sauna pa para d molurat atong mata ana ug kalitan ta.paugatay ug mao na nga selfish nga taw kay nah mabuang ko ug pugson kos d naku gusto maypa magdakol ug mao man gani.
cgehi ko torjack taman pagkawala sa lana ayaw lang ko pugsa usa sa butang nga d pako ready
Hi rose, got ur link from anne. All I can say about your friend situation is that ok lang man mag sign siya ug pre-nup pero dli man gyud kalikayan nga ma hurt atong feelings ana pero inga lang imo frined na ipa prove sa iyang fiancee na dli kwarta iyang habol... ug they have to discuss about this matter why gusto sa lalaki na pa sign non siya ug pre-nuo then ipa explain lang pud sa iyang fiancee unsa iyang reason why di sa siya gusto mag pregnant...kailangan ila na e discuss why gusto sa iyang fiancee manganak sila dayon nga iya man kha pa eskwelahon... aron magka sinabtanan silang duha...hmmm sakto ba ni akong comment diri oi seryoso kaayo ko ron da..good luck to ur friend. naa sad bya ko friend nga me sign ug pre-nup to prove her husband nga dli kwarta iyang gi apas sa iyang bana....
di man pud gud kalikayan sa uban puti nga mag doubt sa uban pinay bisan unsa pa na niya ka love ang imong frined, pero naa man gud uban nga gamiton lang silamao guro ga matngon lang na..pero in short maka bungog gyud nuon ang pulong gna pre-nup especially karon ra me ungat ang lalaki na ania na ang babae sa US..basin pud if me discuss ang lalake about this matter kadtong tua pa imong pren s apinas nga di na nuon mo lahos ug larga imong friend.
Duna bay anak ang iyang fiancee sa una or wala? basin alng gusto siya dayon maka kita sa iyang tisay or tisoy ng aliwat..you know basta half pina cute tot gyud ni ang labas lols
Dah kon ako ana mouli jud ko hinoon pod kon dli mo compromise ang laki, ka selfish pod ana nya oi cya raman ang maniguro, kabalo pod maniguro ang baye oi. mag unsa mana ila pre-nup kon makaanak cla daun magbulag pod bi? ga hasol hasol lang na. unsa mana ang laki diay kick ass ba diay na kay makig pre-nup man?
ABC Bloglearner says...
Wow! Nice post. It really takes the attention of the reader like me.. Well, what is the agreement all about ba? ANyway, i dont really understand American guys honestly.... they want that their partners or wife pe pregnant right away... Yeah, one reason why my previous relationship with an American guy did not succeed...but anyway, much better here in Europe..
I suggest better that she think better and think of her options. If she would be sent to school anyway, better the pre-nup... she will be better than him someday kasi mga magagaling ang Pinay so it would be his loss anyways...
ABC Bloglearner
hi rose...i like your post....great job!!!
Hello Rose like your post here. As i can say lng sa imo friend sa, she have to think about it, try to balance things before she'll goin to come up a decision and dapat both decision should be agreed by both parties kay sila man ang concern. Both of them should not think for their self alone But what's good for them today and the near future. Tell her, to tell her fiancee that they have to talk it very well and see what they can come up. Pro if dli man jud mo compromise iyang fiancee, she might as well forget about it kay there will be no future sa iyaha kay la pa gani sila minyo, dli na sila ka agreed on things, how much more sa mga umaabot pa.
Hi, this is my first time here but I want to say something lang. Your friend's case is quite common because of all the marriages that failed and Filipinas taking off after they have their green cards for better or younger men. It is so hard to trust these days especially if we are talking about losing a lot of money. The pre-nup is to make sure that there will be no harm done when the Filipina decides to leave the marriage. The getting pregnant agreement is also another reason to tie her up so she won't leave so easy. The guy has some insecurity issues but who could blame him with all that goes on these days. So your friend there will really have to make a tough decision, she can either go back home or go for it and see what life is going to bring her if she is serious about the guy and having a family. Sometimes you have to re-consider some things in order for something to work. If she decides to leave then she will lose everything. It is a take it or leave it situation, she can't win at this time. It is unfair that the guy is overly protective-not being considerate, but he is doing it for his own reason not to end up rip-off. It is taking chances for a better life with us; Filipinas. Life is hard talaga if we are not in our own backyard. We can't always have the say so. As for me lang ha. I wouldn't mind what the guy wants as long as he is kind and good to me. If he is a good husband then I would not have any problem with what he wants. He will send me to school but at the same time want me to have a baby. Well, then he needs to take care of business. He better be able to back it all up. I'll be happy to comply rather than going back home and have it worse. Anyway, it is up to your friend now, she knows what is best for her and nobody else.
I believe a pre-nup first and foremost says, "I don't trust you." Secondly it says, "What is mine is mine and when we are married it is still just mine and not yours." Thirdly it says, "I love you but......." If he wants her to get pregnant right away that says, "You need to forget about your dreams and live my dream first" or "If you are pregnant right away then I can control you better." This has disaster written all over it if she marries this very selfish man. It is a bigger test for her, than him. I wish her well.
da oi, wa ko kagusto sa guy, me personally I don't belive in pre-nup kay dapat what is his is mine and what is mine is mine..but seriously dapat walay pre nup dapat share sa tanan labina sa utang :-)..seryoso na gyud..dili gyud ko ganahan ug pre-nup,
Thank you guys for all the comments/opinions/suggestions. My friend was reading all your comments and she is thankful to all of you.
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